Hello! I'm Kate. Welcome to my eclectic blog.
Have a great day :)

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Reblogged from cardioconfidence  85,024 notes

problackgirl:

we’ve taught girls to romanticise nearly everything a boy does. when i was younger i thought it was cute that boys chased the girl even after she said no. i loved it when after a girl moved away from a kiss, the guy would pull her back and force it on. i thought a guy saying ‘i won’t take a no for an answer’ was passionate and romantic. we’re literally always teaching girls to romanticise abusive traits.

Reblogged from size10plz  55,136 notes

When [an abusive man] tells me that he became abusive because he lost control of himself, I ask him why he didn’t do something even worse. For example, I might say, “You called her a fucking whore, you grabbed the phone out of her hand and whipped it across the room, and then you gave her a shove and she fell down. There she was at your feet where it would have been easy to kick her in the head. Now, you have just finished telling me that you were ‘totally out of control’ at that time, but you didn’t kick her. What stopped you?” And the client can always give me a reason. Here are some common explanations:

"I wouldn’t want to cause her a serious injury."
“I realized one of the children was watching.”
“I was afraid someone would call the police.”
“I could kill her if I did that.”
“The fight was getting loud, and I was afraid the neighbors would hear.”

And the most frequent response of all:

"Jesus, I wouldn’t do that. I would never do something like that to her.”

The response that I almost never heard — I remember hearing it twice in the fifteen years — was: “I don’t know.”

These ready answers strip the cover off of my clients’ loss of control excuse. While a man is on an abusive rampage, verbally or physically, his mind maintains awareness of a number of questions: “Am I doing something that other people could find out about, so it could make me look bad? Am I doing anything that could get me in legal trouble? Could I get hurt myself? Am I doing anything that I myself consider too cruel, gross, or violent?”

A critical insight seeped into me from working with my first few dozen clients: An abuser almost never does anything that he himself considers morally unacceptable. He may hide what he does because he thinks other people would disagree with it, but he feels justified inside. I can’t remember a client ever having said to me: “There’s no way I can defend what I did. It was just totally wrong.” He invariably has a reason that he considers good enough. In short, an abuser’s core problem is that he has a distorted sense of right and wrong.

I sometimes ask my clients the following question: “How many of you have ever felt angry enough at youer mother to get the urge to call her a bitch?” Typically half or more of the group members raise their hands. Then I ask, “How many of you have ever acted on that urge?” All the hands fly down, and the men cast appalled gazes on me, as if I had just asked whether they sell drugs outside elementary schools. So then I ask, “Well, why haven’t you?” The same answer shoots out from the men each time I do this exercise: “But you can’t treat your mother like that, no matter how angry you are! You just don’t do that!”

The unspoken remainder of this statement, which we can fill in for my clients, is: “But you can treat your wife or girlfriend like that, as long as you have a good enough reason. That’s different.” In other words, the abuser’s problem lies above all in his belief that controlling or abusing his female partner is justifiable….

By Lundy Bancroft, Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men (via seebster)

Reblogged from tessaviolet  456,859 notes

bobdoom:

lunathepug:

What kind of noise is that supposed to be, Luna?

This is 100% worth sharing again.  It’s one of my favorite videos of all time.

Reblogged from cherbearnobyl  97,961 notes
jawnthebaptiste:

kingjaffejoffer:

Michael Brown’s dad before the burial. 
The emotion and all of the sweat…. shit is hard to look at, even if its only a picture

I didn’t want to reblog this because it’s hard to look at, but people SHOULD see it.
We SHOULD see a father mourning his teenage son.
We SHOULD see how a killing like Mike’s can take a toll on not only a community, but a family.
It’s as easy for young black men to become martyrs as it is for them to become victims. They can never just be humans. 
We can never just be.

jawnthebaptiste:

kingjaffejoffer:

Michael Brown’s dad before the burial. 

The emotion and all of the sweat…. shit is hard to look at, even if its only a picture

I didn’t want to reblog this because it’s hard to look at, but people SHOULD see it.

We SHOULD see a father mourning his teenage son.

We SHOULD see how a killing like Mike’s can take a toll on not only a community, but a family.

It’s as easy for young black men to become martyrs as it is for them to become victims. They can never just be humans. 

We can never just be.

Reblogged from ironbornasha  108,014 notes
cute-pubes:

As I was sitting in the back of the police car, I remembered the countless times my father came home frustrated or humiliated by the cops when he had done nothing wrong. I felt his shame, his anger, and my own feelings of frustration for existing in a world where I have allowed myself to believe that “authority figures” could control my BEING… my ability to BE!
Danièle’s husband, Brian Lucas, who is white, says he believes they were targeted because they are an interracial couple.
Read more here

cute-pubes:

As I was sitting in the back of the police car, I remembered the countless times my father came home frustrated or humiliated by the cops when he had done nothing wrong. I felt his shame, his anger, and my own feelings of frustration for existing in a world where I have allowed myself to believe that “authority figures” could control my BEING… my ability to BE!

Danièle’s husband, Brian Lucas, who is white, says he believes they were targeted because they are an interracial couple.

Read more here

Reblogged from ironbornasha  28,683 notes

nearlybecamehistoric:

deusexignis:

iridium-flames:

vixsubridens:

asheathes:

WIZARDING SCHOOLS AROUND THE WORLD: CHINA

Located in deep in the Guilin mountains, shrouded in mist and frequented by dragons that live in the multitude of winding rivers, the students of the Chinese Institute of Magic don their colourful wizarding garbs every September 1st for their return to school whereupon they are treated to spectacular opening festivities involving, but not limited to: choreographed martial arts performances from their combat professors, an assortment of acrobatic wonders, and “Mystery Mooncakes” specially made for the mid-autumn festival.

#BUT WAIT #HOUSES BASED ON THE ORIGINAL FOUR #THE TIGER THE DRAGON THE PHOENIX THE TORTOISE

#just imagine how powerful their magic is though #they’ve been developing it for almost 2000 years longer than western magic imagine how refined and beautiful

#harry potter being eurocentric was such a fuckin’ waste

#my favourite thing is how those of us who have grow up with harry potter are now saying “no that’s not enough” and are expanding the universe #like we’re all critically looking at the books and realizing everything that’s wrong with them and fixing it ourselves #and idk i think that’s amazing